Colleen Orchanian

[Part 3 of a series on spiritual warfare]

Have you ever heard someone speak about "their God?" My God is this. My God is that. My God wouldn't do xyz. Maybe you have said those words or something like it. When we say, My God in this way, it implies something. It might imply that I have created a God who agrees with me (rather than me agreeing with my Creator God). It might imply that there are multiple gods and this is the one I have chosen, when the reality is that there is only one true God, and He has chosen me. It might imply that each of us gets our own God, as if there are many to choose from when there is only one. All others are counterfeits.

We often read about identity theft, where someone pretends to be you and spends all your money or sells your house. There is another kind of identity theft – a spiritual one. God wants to show us our true identity, and Satan wants to prevent that. He wants to steal the identity we have been given.

One of my favorite children's books is Madeline, which is about a little girl in Paris. In the story you will find this line, Miss Clavel turned on her light and said, "Something is not right!"

Spiritual warfare is when "something is not right" in our life.

Three takeaways from a recent retreat: We have three ears. Empty is good. Love is unstoppable. 

Have you ever caught your dog being bad? You scold him, Bad dog! and he slinks away in shame. I realize that some dogs are quite proud when misbehaving, but the more sensitive ones don't want to disappoint their owners.

There are times I have felt like the bad dog when I sin or fall short of my call as a Christian. I hang my head in embarrassment for disappointing God.

Many years ago my husband was feeling neglected because I worked a lot. I had a consulting business and it was normal to work 60-hour weeks. One day he accused me of making work more important than him. I disagreed and said confidently, "No I don't. I have my priorities written in my day planner and you're at the top of the list." His response: "So what? When you have to choose between me and work, you always choose work."

His challenge, "So what?" was valid. All the words we say, all the words we write, if they aren't backed up with actions, are meaningless. Our conversation changed my choices – not overnight, but over time. I needed someone to point out that I was missing the mark.

Don't we all need that sometimes? Especially us Christians.

Six-year-old Noah loves sword fighting. He has no idea of the rules. He just likes to bang swords together. He shouts En garde! and then we begin. Sometimes he has a shield as extra protection. He loves a good fight.

I, too, have a shield and sword and sometimes love a good fight. Other times I don't want to fight but I'm drawn into it by someone else. They say or do something that provokes me and I respond. 

I'm reading a book called Humility Rules by Fr. Augustine Wetta. The subtitle is St. Benedict's 12-Step Guide to Genuine Self-Esteem. The title doesn't seem to make sense. How can humility lead to self-esteem?

I had friends over for dinner to get input on my next book about spiritual warfare. Spiritual warfare is the daily battle we fight to grow in holiness and save souls – ours and those of the people we love. The battle part comes from the devil trying to prevent that from happening.

Maggie likes to make bucket lists. She's 14. That seems a bit young for a bucket list, but it works for her. She has one for every season. It usually has things like having sleepovers with friends, taking pictures at a pumpkin patch, going to the pool at least 5 times, taking a trip to the beach, etc.

I've never written a bucket list, but Maggie got me thinking about a different kind of list – a Spiritual Bucket List. A regular bucket list is usually things you want to do before you die – places to go, experiences to have, and so on. A spiritual bucket list is similar – what spiritual experiences do I want before I die?

I have many friends and relatives who are caring for elderly parents or sick spouses. That kind of caregiving is very draining, both physically and emotionally. It requires the best of us when we're exhausted, which is tough. I am not at my best when I'm tired. Self-care is the key – taking care of our body, mind, and soul so that we can care for those we love when the demand is great.

Rushing is a normal response to time pressures, even though it's not very effective. I know that from experience, yet I often find that I, like the White Rabbit in Alice in Wonderland, am hurrying in mind and body. Sometimes I have to remind myself to slow down and breathe.

I have been thinking about grace, and how the unlimited grace God makes available to each person. These days I can recognize grace in my life. I have the grace of a long marriage, the grace of motherhood, the grace to serve in different ways in my church, and the grace to do this podcast and write books. It's crazy the amount of grace in my life – like an explosion of grace.

I often invite people to join a group at church or attend a retreat or event, and sometimes the response I get is – My plate is too full. I know that feeling. There have been many times in my life that my plate has been overflowing and I'm feeling a lot of stress. I want the world to stop for just a bit so I can get caught up. Unfortunately, I have never been able to make that happen, so I have to find another way to deal with the load.

I told a friend that I was doing a retreat near her home and she suggested we meet afterwards. Then she asked – Do you think you'll be too tired? That would make sense. It takes energy to lead a retreat. When I was in the training business, I led corporate workshops and was usually exhausted at the end of the day. But when I finish a retreat at church, the opposite happens. I am energized. It takes a while for me to settle down afterward. It's not until much later that I feel spent.

My father was a deacon in the Catholic church for many years before he died. I remember his ordination and the words the Bishop said when giving Dad the Book of the Gospels: The bishop placed the Book in Dad's hands and said, “Receive the Gospel of Christ, whose herald you have become. Believe what you read, teach what you believe, and practice what you teach.” Those words apply to all believers.

In Matthew 25:31-46 Jesus teaches that we are to be His hands and feet. "Truly I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these, you did it to me." That sounds great in theory, but in application, it's not so easy. He is telling us that each person we encounter – whether someone we live with or work with or someone we run into at the store – we are to treat as if they are Jesus Himself.

My sister, Theresa, called the other day hoping for some advice from me and others in the family – Mom and Debbie. Her question was, How do I break my addiction to electronics – games, scrolling, etc? Every one of us had the same response – We struggle with that, too! And since we were all in the same boat, we spent some time talking about the problem. Whatever our chosen distraction, most of us wish we had better self-discipline.

When I was a kid, church was different. We acted differently there than anywhere else. We dressed differently, wearing our Sunday best. We even spoke differently, not just the words we said but the way we said them as well. It was not your outside voice. Church was a sacred place. Everyone knew it and it showed in their actions.

Today is different. Our culture is different.

I graduated from college in 1980 with a degree in Women's Studies. It was a new thing back then and the man who would later become my husband asked me if that meant I studied cooking and sewing. (He may have been joking…) At the time, I was interested in equality – in men and women having the same opportunities and rights in the law, work, and so on. My ideal was that each person be empowered to be all they could be.

Applying that idea to a Christian worldview, we desire that each person be all that God created them to be. The word most often associated with this idea of equality is Empowerment, which is defined as the authority or power given to someone to do something.