The Bucket List

Dec 04, 2024 by Colleen C Orchanian

Maggie likes to make bucket lists. She's 14. That seems a bit young for a bucket list, but it works for her. She has one for every season. It usually has things like having sleepovers with friends, taking pictures at a pumpkin patch, going to the pool at least 5 times, taking a trip to the beach, etc.

I've never written a bucket list, but Maggie got me thinking about a different kind of list – a Spiritual Bucket List. A regular bucket list is usually things you want to do before you die – places to go, experiences to have, and so on. A spiritual bucket list is similar – what spiritual experiences do I want before I die?

Wouldn't that be more helpful than a regular bucket list? After all, this world is passing away, but Heaven is eternal. A spiritual bucket list will help me get to Heaven.

There is an old Roman tradition called Memento Mori, which means "Remember That You Must Die." The Romans carried a symbol of death to remind them of the fragility of life. On Ash Wednesday, when we receive ashes, the priest says, "Remember that you are dust, and unto dust, you shall return." (from Genesis 13:19) When we remember our death, we keep things in perspective. On my deathbed, I won't be wishing I had closed one more deal. I will likely wish I had not wasted so much time on things that are meaningless in eternity.

So what might be on my spiritual bucket list – or yours?

Retreats. I love going on retreats. It's a time to be removed from the day-to-day of life and focus on my relationship with God without distractions. I've been on lots of retreats. Some with family members, others with friends, and a few all by myself. But I've never done a silent retreat. That's when you go away for several days or more and during most of that time, you are silent. You pray, go to Mass, meditate on Scripture, and maybe listen to a talk by the retreat leader. But mostly you're silent. That's so you can better hear God's voice. A silent retreat is definitely on my spiritual bucket list.

Pilgrimages. These are trips that are less vacation and more of a traveling retreat. I've been on pilgrimage to the Holy Land, Mexico City, and Poland. Both were fast-paced, exhausting, and enlightening. We stood where martyrs were killed and where saints lived. We walked the way of the cross of Jesus. Being in a holy place of history is a special experience. Things become more real. The stories we have heard come alive. I think I would like to take another pilgrimage or two – maybe to Italy and France.

Experiences with Family. I would like to see a family member (or two) experience God in a new way. I've been on a pilgrimage with my husband and would love to go again. I would also like to take a trip or retreat with my adult son. Sharing an experience of God with someone you love is such a blessing. And to see them encounter God in a different way warms your heart.

Prayer. I have some prayer things on my spiritual bucket list, like a mystical experience, but that's not something I can make happen. It's pure grace. Still, it's on my list. And I would like to come to a point in life when my prayer life is more predictable. Right now I am often interrupted by a 6-year-old, and I've been known to fall asleep during prayer time. Maybe when we are empty nesters again that will happen. Or maybe not. Either way, I want more in my prayer life, so that's on my bucket list.

Serving. My spiritual bucket list has to have something on it related to service. For me, I think it would be nice to know that my work, whatever it is – writing, retreats, podcasting, friendships – actually made a difference in someone's spiritual life. I want to know that my life mattered.

Reconciliation. We all have broken relationships caused by our sin, pride, or selfishness. I hope that when I die, I have reconciled all of those relationships that I have harmed and that I have forgiven those who have hurt me. I want to be healed from the wounds of life. I don't want to get over the trauma. I want God to heal it completely. When I am healed, I can forgive. When I forgive, I can be reconciled. In the last year of my Dad's life, he worked hard to reconcile with those he had harmed. He couldn't find everyone but was able to die knowing he had done all he could to repair what he had broken. It was on his spiritual bucket list.

Virtue. God calls us to be holy, and the only thing stopping us is us. Our sin. Our lack of virtue. So I might put something on my bucket list that addresses a particular virtue I want to master. St. Therese, the Little Flower, mastered the virtue of love. She loved in very small ways and was known for that virtue. I might need to pray about which virtue I want to master – or maybe which vice I want to overcome.

Ultimately, my spiritual bucket list will include a happy death. I want to die well, having received last rites. I want to be prepared to meet our Lord and enter into His glorious presence. Nothing is more important than that.

Those are some of the things on my spiritual bucket list. Many are out of my control – they are gifts from God. But others require action on my part. If I want to go on a pilgrimage or retreat, I have to make a plan. And I have to be open to whatever grace God has for me on that experience. If I go on retreat and keep connected to the things of the world – the news, politics, drama in my family or parish – I'm allowing the world to block grace. Openness and docility to the Holy Spirit are so important if we want to make the most of the things on our bucket list.

A spiritual bucket list is a good thing. It makes us consider what's important in life and how we can grow spiritually. It can be the start of personal goals for spiritual formation. If you want more, make a spiritual bucket list and begin working through it. God may surprise you with all that he has planned. I am certain that God's list for me is beyond anything I can imagine. So I'll keep myself open to more, but get started with the list I have. I hope you will do the same.

Questions for prayer:

  1. What is on your spiritual bucket list and why?
  2. What obstacles are blocking your spiritual growth? How can you turn those into something for your bucket list?