Receive
Receive is an important word in the Catholic Church. When we are confirmed, the bishop lays hands on the head and says, "Receive the gift of the Holy Spirit." We learn in First Communion classes that we are receiving the Body, Blood, Soul and Divinity of Jesus. We receive the sacraments of baptism and marriage. We receive absolution in the sacrament of Reconciliation or Confession.
In every case, the idea is to submit our wills to God's and open our hearts, minds, and souls to the graces of the sacraments.
There are things in life that we are supposed to receive, but sometimes we grasp for them. When you have a toy for a child, they might grab it out of your hand. We teach kids not to do that because it's rude. In the same way, God has things for us, and we sometimes try to grab them rather than waiting for Him to place the gift in our hands.
Grasping
Here's what grasping might look like.
I want to feel closer to God and have a mystical experience, but it's not happening. I've tried all the prayer techniques suggested by the Church, and nothing works. Then I hear about a psychedelic drug that helps people get in touch with God in a new way. It sounds really good. And I've tried everything else without success. This is a good desire, so I tell myself that how I fill that desire should not matter. That is grasping.
I want to be inspired by scripture. I've read the entire Bible, and it's not speaking to me. This chapter doesn't do anything, so I read the next one, or switch books, or read faster so I can get to a passage I like. That's grasping.
I am hungry for knowledge and buy tons of books, reading ten at the same time. They are all interesting, but none is transforming me because my goal is to read, not to encounter God. I'm grasping for knowledge without desiring Wisdom Himself.
I have a child who is not going to church, and I fear for his soul. I keep praying for him. Why aren't my prayers being answered? Why is God taking so long? I decide to take things into my own hands and whenever I can. I talk about how he needs to get back to church. I am grasping for my way and my timing.
I feel emptiness in my life, and so I fill my online shopping cart with things I don't need. I am grasping for something to fill that emptiness, but seeking something other than God. It doesn't satisfy, of course. But I keep grasping.
Why do we so often grasp at the spiritual? Many reasons:
Ego. We want our own way. We think we're pretty smart, and what we want must be good. I wanted something that was technically not acceptable in the Catholic Church. By technically, I mean it was definitely not okay. But I asked my priest, Hey, can I do this? He said no, so I went priest shopping. I went to another priest and got the same answer. I tried a third priest, who agreed with the last two. My shopping trip was a bust. At that point, I gave up my own will. I stopped grasping.
Ungodly Self-Reliance. We Americans have a can-do attitude, and we work to make things happen. We think it should be the same with our spiritual life, in our relationship with God. It's up to me to make it happen. I can't receive when I think it's all up to me. I must leave room for the Holy Spirit. It's hard to do that sometimes.
Entitlement. We think we deserve something. A particular spiritual gift. A free ticket to heaven because we make it to church on Sunday. A miracle for a sick friend because we are a good person and our prayers should be answered. It's true that God wants to bless us, but in reality He owes us nothing. When we have a servant attitude, we can receive. Entitlement leads to grasping.
Lack of Faith. We don't believe God will take care of us, so we go it alone. It's Israel in the desert when the manna began. They were told how much to take each day, but some took more than they needed. They didn't trust God. They wanted a little extra just in case. That extra was no good the next day. They should have trusted in God's provision. When we doubt that God will provide for our needs, we grasp. We do not receive.
Rejecting
Rejection is another attitude that blocks grace. I heard a story of a woman who had an experience of God where He showed her heaven. He brought her to a room filled with unopened gifts. She asked what it was, and he said, "Those are all the gifts I had for you that you would not open."
What does it look like when we reject God's gifts? When we are not receptive?
God wants to give us peace. The peace that comes from heaven, not worldly peace. But in our pride, we get worked up over the conflicts and politics of the day. I will argue my position and get agitated with those who think differently. I have been offered the gift of peace by God, but in my need to be right, I reject it. Pride and ego block my ability to receive.
God has a purpose for our lives, one that will use our unique gifts. But I may not feel like using my gifts. I don't feel comfortable with them, or it takes too much effort, and I would rather have an easy life that brings worldly success. Ambition and fear block my ability to receive and fulfill my life's purpose.
God wants to heal me. He wants me to be whole, to know that I am beloved. But in my brokenness, I reject His unconditional love. Too many times I have been hurt when I have loved. Fear keeps me from healing because I might get hurt more, and I don't know if I can take it. Fear blocks my ability to receive love. And if I can't receive love, I have none to give.
Receptivity
Let's contrast the attitudes of grasping and rejection with receptivity. Three virtues are at the heart of receptivity.
Humility. I recognize my littleness before God. I know of what I am made, and that's okay, because I know God loves me, anyway. I know my place. I'm not trying to put myself above others. I wait for God to put into my life whatever He wants. I don't need to chase after it.
Gratitude. All is gift. I am grateful for everything. The joys and sorrows. Good health and bad. I know that everything works together for good for those who love the Lord, so I thank God in all things. Ten lepers were cleansed, but only one returned to thank Jesus. He had gratitude.
Trust. I know that God desires only good for me. I know that God sees things that I cannot see. He sees the big picture and I see only one very small part. God's thoughts are so much above mine. If I trust Him, I can wait on His timing. I can accept anything in my life. I am open to receiving whatever he wants to give.
How can we be more receptive to God?
First, prayerfully consider where you are grasping or rejecting. Are you waiting on the Lord in prayer or are you trying to force Him to act? Are you ignoring the promptings of the Holy Spirit?
Be curious about why you are grasping. What obstacle is hindering your trust in God's perfect plan? Do you need to know God better? Are you fearful of what God is asking of you or His plan for you? Has a false image of God crept into your soul?
When you identify the root cause, the reason you are not receiving God's grace, then you can start working on it. Cultivate the virtues that will draw you closer to God, allow you to listen and trust more.
Imagine going to God with your hands open, reaching up to Him and waiting. How does it feel to wait? Are you excited? Frustrated? Disappointed? Doubtful? Then imagine Him reaching out with a gift. What is it? What is He placing in your open hands? Look into his eyes as you receive. See the love he has for you. Then, take the gift and hold it to your heart. Whatever it is, know it was given to you in love. A precious gift prepared for you by the one who loves you perfectly. Sit with that gift. Then thank God for it.
Be open. Receive the blessings God has for you.
Questions for prayer:
-
Is there something you are grasping for (or have in the past)? Why has it been difficult to wait on God's timing?
-
Are there gifts or graces you know you have rejected? What is preventing you from being more receptive to God?
-
How can you be more open to receiving the gifts God has for you?